Let Go of the Rock

“Everything serves a purpose. The same thing does not serve every purpose.”

There was once a person who was walking within the wilderness, and as they came across a clearing, they were confronted by a bear. In this moment of fear, they glanced down and spotted a large rock and picked it up to protect. The bear postured, and then lunged, and the rock was used.

Later in the evening, the person placed the same rock around their fire to protect them from the flames as they slept.

In the morning, as they ventured out and were walking, they placed the rock on top of larger stacked boulders to reach a higher ground, and thus, a higher vantage point with which to view the valley below.

Later in the day, the person came across a stream. With their rock securely packed away, they entered the stream, as there was no immediate way in their charted path to diverge from the course. As they entered the stream, the waters were strong with current and the rocks were slippery affecting the ability to maintain stability. The person slipped, fell, and could not get up for the rock pinned them to the bottom of the bed. Panic stricken, the person paused in thought. The decision was made to let go—removing the pack, with the rock inside, allowing the person to slip out.

In our days, there are things that we will come across and use for our advantage. Use them, for there is purpose. Once the quest or goal is accomplished, learn to let go of with gratitude. This will free you and allow you to see, or be open to, more things to use along your way.

Everything serves a purpose.

The same thing does not serve every purpose.

If we tune into ourselves just a little, we will see that we are synchronizing with everything and everyone all of the time. Turn yourself on and know that you did!

Humans have evolved to learn how to, not only observe our environments and respond, we have developed in a manner in which we can process potential outcomes before they occur. This is an evolutionary advantage that has propelled our species, Homosapien’s, within the animal kingdom. How we got here is key. But there is so much more!

The ability to forecast can become problematic at times, commonly is referred to as, mind-chatter or scattered thinking, and often mistaken as anxiety rather than a symptom of. It is like we continue to run our minds with fossils fuels, even though a rich, energy efficient option is always available. Learning how to work with our minds intimately and innately is instrumental to personal growth, which will resonate and permeate into all of our relationships and interactions.

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Here are some terms to ponder:

·        Cognitive Pattern: A series of conscious reasoning tactics which develop a sequence of cognitions, complete with reflective feelings, that loop back to original perceived problem.

o   Key point: Guide conscious cognitive pattern into mindful awareness. * Essential to learning to counter. 

·        Pivot Points: A word, i.e. “but” or “however”, within a series of thoughts that appears while cognitively processing.

· Countering: The back-and-forth of thoughts, a tick-tock, “should I or shouldn’t I, that occurs naturally when cognitively processing a perceived problem or making a decision. Learning to counter helps to create a new cognitive pattern and helps the individual to weigh both possibilities to settle unsettled feelings. (Feelings drive thoughts, and thoughts drive behaviors).

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The key to any relationship is emotional regulation and communication. However, when there is no deep, heartfelt communication, if there is an inability to regulate the emotional rise, we all experience the feeling of separation—detached in the moment. Learning to reconnect with the ourself and tune into the inner spirit (tactus), creates an internal connection which confirms your true inner security necessary to respond back into the environment (usually a person). This is the initial step to cognitively processing anything… effectively. Once the feeling is attuned and settled, we begin to reflect on and assess our thought processing skills by learning to use countering to uncover these cognitive patterns of reasoning. The result can be an experience of relief—reducing mind-chatter, while effectively utilizing forecasting as a strategy, rather then, a reality.

Hint: There is no replication. The outcome is what it is, or, the way or the Tao. What happens is that we learn more about how we have been rolling with it all along—sometimes stressful, sometimes depressed, sometimes filled with worry, and sometimes calmly. But if we tune into ourselves just a little, we will see that we are synchronizing with everything and everyone all of the time. This is so cheesy, but I am saying it anyhow, turn yourself on and know that you did!

Tao Approach To Therapy: Method To Reduce Our Mind-Chatter

Opus Cum Sui: Working with the Self

The theory states that each individual is the expert in their lives. In such, ever action, every thought, emotion, memory, decision made is purposeful, and therefore, is synchronistic with person and the event. There is no “right or wrong”, there is no “good or bad”. We discover that there are specific reasons why we feel, which are commonly overlooked, and jettisoned into the mind to problem solve.

Unfortunately, most of the time, the unsettled mind (created by the unsettled feeling) is creating undue pressure to our mind’s cognitive load. This is known as stress.

Through learning how to tap (tactus) into our feeling and, figuratively, “sit” with our-self, we learn how to attune to how we truly experience the moment. Once internal security is experienced, I am witnessing that people (patients) are letting go of issues quicker.

Setting The Tone

Upon evening reflections, revelations may bring to light routine patterns with repetitive stressors. Setting the tone for the day, by establishing a simple morning routine, can be extremely powerful in reducing experiences associated with being overwhelmed.

Recommendation: Keep it simple & incorporate things that you love.

Example:

1. Wake up and do something to connect to nature

2. Reflect with gratitude

3. Sit with, and recognize, gratitude (the state, what you are thankful for, the experience, your breath, ect.)

As we set the tone for the day in a peaceful way, neurologically, we (logically!) secrete less stress hormones in the moment (morning), and therefore enter the day in a physically relaxed state. Since we are creatures of habit, this habit of establishing calm will continue to stretch into your morning longer, and longer, creating (theoretically) more peace.

Give it a try. Please feel free to share your experiences

Opus Cum Sui: Working with the Self

Mar 27

Written By Sean Travis

The theory states that each individual is the expert in their lives. In such, ever action, every thought, emotion, memory, decision made is purposeful, and therefore, is synchronistic with person and the event. There is no “right or wrong”, there is no “good or bad”. We discover that there are specific reasons why we feel, which are commonly overlooked, and jettisoned into the mind to problem solve. Unfortunately, most of the time, the unsettled mind (created by the unsettled feeling) is creating undue pressure to our mind’s cognitive load. This is known as stress.

Through learning how to tap (tactus) into our feeling and, figuratively, “sit” with our-self, we learn how to attune to how we truly experience the moment. Once internal security is experienced, I am witnessing that people (patients) are letting go of issues quicker. On par, previously this could have taken half of the session to process and sometimes I would question the depth of acceptance.

There is a cognitive perspective in which techniques, e.g. countering, or terms e.g. pivot points and Building the Case, as well as self-compassion and gratitude, are developed from Systems Theory, and complemented with Eastern Theories of Taoism. Self-compassion and gratitude are incorporated to affirm the “freedom”, “relief”, and, I like this one, no words but a smile, that people convey once they settle the self.

Focus

“93-Confidence

Truth perceived gives assurance.

Skill yields self-reliance.

With courage, we can defy danger.

To increase power, increase humility.”

~Deng Ming Dao, 1992

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Without knowing our-self,

We cannot have a

Balanced stance

In Life. 

Opus Cum Sui (Working with the self), will not guarantee happiness. It is a method that will help you reduce the mind-chatter, that creates stress—afflicting the body, mind, relationships (where we practice humility), and yes, happiness.  

So, as you breathe-in, become aware where your mind leads you and welcome the connection. Acknowledging the connection through gratitude creates an anchoring effect, which promotes true internal security. When internal security is met, the perceived need for a defense strategy (coping skill, mechanism, technique, etc.) is no longer necessary, allowing for true self to be present—accepting, forgiving, and humble.

Find your rock and learn to explore the object

Nowadays, people are primed to think. As such, the beginnings of meditation can be difficult for people. The mind is always going—hard to slow down. The mindset behind Opus Cum Sui is simply to work with your-self. If prone to think first, let us use our mind to slow down by using old tricks such as, behavioral conditioning and thinking, to our advantage.

I like rocks. All sorts of rocks. I pick them up whenever I go. A quick analysis: childhood and freedom to explore the environment. I learned that it is okay to pick stuff up and explore. So, I still do. Rocks are cool. The Earth is cool. In sessions, I will give people rocks to help them to learn to recenter.

Find your rock and learn to explore the object, well. Take a minute. A strong minute, and feel your body connect to the object, the rock. Is it hard? Is it heavy? Is it cold? What does cold feel like? Where do I feel the cold? Breathe into the cold area, and connect. As we connect, briefly we experience the self-connection, sui. Self-connection is experienced when meditating, or the feeling experience when you are transitioning into sleep, but still somehow consciously aware—a releasing.

Take a moment and reconnect today. Use an object, such as a cup of tea or the top of a table… if it is boring, great! Move around the cup or the table until you feel something different, and connect to the feeling—ask and inquire. Be inquisitive, be in the moment and be in-yourself differently with a reflective breath or two. Smile. 

Foundation steps

Understanding how we attach, why we attach, what is attaching and who is doing the attaching is seldomly revered as worthwhile or valuable, when it pertains to us. Other people? No problem. Me? Not enough time… An oversight in attuning to our feeling—our energy shift, places an extra (and unnecessary) burden on the cognitive process. Taxing the cognitive process floods our working memory, which makes processing extremely difficult (headache). Learning to work with our self can help to eliminate any unnecessary mind-chatter, and help to redirect our focus (energy) onto whatever we desire.

Exercise:

As you breathe in, ask yourself, how do I feel? As you breathe out, notice where your mind takes you… Repeat, while gently noticing yourself.

Process:

Learning to become aware—On reflection

·        What did you notice?

·        What happened with your mind-action?

·        Did it take you to a thought? Or, did you notice a sensation, perhaps a sound coupled by a body sensation? Perhaps something else…

In learning to attune to our-self, awareness is key. As we learn to shift our awareness, we turn our mind-focus inwardly. This inward action is like tuning a guitar—softly working the strings to a point in which the tone of the instrument is synchronistic. We are our own luthier. Recognizing the instrument is key.

As we breathe, we begin to recognize, and Smile.

Setting a foundation for self-awareness and self-attunement

Changing the way we experience ourself, changes the way we interpret the external experience.

I continue to witness people, including myself, operating on overdrive. Generating increased taxation on their minds. Learning to check in with ourselves allows for a smoother experience mentally while processing a situation, or a perceived problem. The possible residual effects, such as focus (immediate result) or confidence and self-assurance, can be life changing—changing the way we experience ourself, changes the way we interpret the external experience.

Step 1: Attune
Begin to recognize your connection with yourself in the environment. In the morning, or a time that may be calmer, find yourself sitting with a cup of tea, or perhaps coffee, and begin to notice the warmth of the cup or the smell. Acknowledge the feeling, acknowledging what is commonly referred to as, “’it’ was like…”, and reflect. Reflecting on the experience, whether “it” be the taste or the smell, begin to breathe in… and breathe out with your thought-reflection. Blending it all as one.

Setting a foundation for self-awareness and self-attunement.

Opus Cum Sui—Working with Self

Behavioral conditioning has been instrumental in shaping, and currently guiding (mostly) society, i.e. industry, schooling, marketing, and, even, parenting. Reflecting into our self (communicating with ourself) is essential in developing a relationship with ourself, others, and the world.

Introspection is fundamental. How we practice is key in shaping how life is experienced. Do we ask ourselves these questions? “Have I been conditioned to focus externally for solutions, solely?”, or “How do I think (process)?”.

Humans are dynamic. Learning to work with our self—the ego, spirit, soul, etc., and the various ways we respond to our environments, as they change too, is essential in developing our personal blueprint/path/ guide through our life.

I hear quite a bit, “I’ve been in therapy for so long, and see, I am still talking about this? “. Why can’t I let it go?”. I believe a factor, which is overlooked to a degree, is how we experience. How we feel in the moment is bypassed and the load is shifted entirely into cognitive processing, with a drive focused solely on a behavioral outcome (driven to soothe a feeling, ironic?).

Side note: It can be extremely difficult to process sensory input when alert systems are activated (sympathetic nervous system) due to the frontal cortex going offline, seen on fMRI scans, and the amygdala highly activated, simultaneously. Neurologically, this is why we are stuck, basically. #neuropsychology #harvardmedicalschool

I am discovering, from observations, that tapping (tactus) into ourselves, checking with how we feel, allows a natural release to be experienced while processing a shocking, unnerving event. #taoism #theway

I will be posting more on steps to tap (tactus) into our self (sui), based on self-observations of practice outcomes, as well as personal outcomes and discoveries from self-reflections. #anxiety #mentalhealth American Psychological Association #personalgrowth #systemsthinking

https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:7045075788538245121

Photo: Dilek Önder

A thought or a suggestion on transformation

Photo by Florin Tomozei on Unsplash

By practicing compassion for others, we experience compassion too. In that moment there is an action which creates an experience of compassion–for the other, as well as for the self. 

If we seek something, be it. Then you have the experience rather than seeking something you cannot access and experiencing whatever is attached to not having–perhaps annoyance, frustration, sadness, what may be. By doing it or being it–compassion, empathy, patience we experience, feel, sense, attain the very thing we seek. 

Practice not expecting the event to come to you. Be it. We experience what we are.

Nightly Inventory

Would we understand situations differently if we constructively reflect?

Photo by Lukas Robertson on Unsplash

Worry is a seemingly non-stop thought process that creates increased pressure and stress for many of us. But we still do it! Have we ever paused and reflected on why we worry? What, if any, are the benefits of worrying? How does the act (behavior) of worry impact our well-being, our relationships or, our state of mind? 

Asking questions, such as the one’s above, can help to shed some light into the effects of our actions, emotions, and thoughts. What would it be like if we paused and reflected on our day? Would we understand situations differently if we constructively reflect? I believe that we would. In fact, I believe that we would experience the situation and ourselves in the situation quite differently. We may reduce the pressure that we place on ourselves. In addition, we may develop clarity into the circumstance in such a manner that we can develop alternative options. 

Below is an exercise that I refer to as the Nightly Inventory. It is simple in structure, as well as in application. I recommend trying to review every night until it becomes comfortable enough to process in your head.

Honesty

Sometimes we find help in places where we are not even looking, or even aware of.

Photo by Robert Koorenny on Unsplash

Being honest allows the self to be in the here and now—reality. When we are honest, we are not living in a delusional state of being. There is no fantasy, no story to remember. The result will be less confusion, which allows us to make real, concrete choices.

I was sitting in an office, I once used while working in a community mental health agency, towards the end of the day. As I started to complete some paperwork, a colleague entered the office to chat, as he often did. Greeting him, I welcomed him to take a seat and relax. Jim began to talk about this and that, and within his stories he turned to me, for whatever reason I am uncertain and do not care to analyze at this moment, and made a statement that resonates with me to this day. “Sean, the simplest solution to any problem is the truth” (Dr. James Walsh, n.d.). He elaborated, and I am sure he was eloquent. I, however, will not. I will simply repeat. The simplest solution to any problem is the truth. 

Thank you, Jim!

Sometimes we find help in places where we are not looking, or even aware of.

Time

Time is a word, nothing more and nothing less.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

“I don’t have enough time!”. “Where did the ‘time’ go?”. The way we manage our lives greatly influences our experience of life, and ourselves. If we perceive that we “don’t have enough time”, we may begin to experience pressure—self-imposed pressure. This experience can generate symptoms of anxiety, releasing stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol, accompanied by a myriad of thoughts which race back and forth, and everywhere. Is this how we want to experience life? No. Well, I would think that this is an unpleasant experience, and therefore, this would not be our first choice. However, many of us do, and do on a daily basis. Year, after year.

So what is time? Seriously. What is time? Well, time is constant, an ever-changing, something. Can you touch time? Can you smell time? Can you hear time? Can you taste time? Can you see time? We cannot. We can remember our experiences through accessing long-term memories and bringing them out into our working memory, but we cannot see time. Time allows us to reflect on events. Time provides structure and limits or constraints. But what is time? Time is a human-made construct. Nothing more. It is a word, with a defining element, but a word nonetheless. Time is a manner in which we measure our life. “Time” is limiting. We distort our lives by our conceptions of “time”. So, what is time to you? What is time for you?

Time is a word, nothing more and nothing less. It is a measure to assist us in managing our lives. Or, so we believe. However, are we not mismanaging our lives by viewing life through the lenses of constraints and limitations? What is the effect of this approach as a measure of life? Ultimately, it appears, that many of us experience increased pressure, stress, anxiety, and even alterations in mood as a result of this perception that “time is running out”, or “I don’t have enough time!”. Without going down a philosophical rabbit hole, I encourage you to reflect on how you view time in your life and ask yourself, what is time for you?. Reflections are extremely important to understand how we are experiencing the moment, how we experience our lives.

“It is time to change.”, “The time is now.”, “What time is it?”. Anxiety, Anxiety. Anxiety!

I am encouraging introspection here, a way to think about the way to speak, and the way we communicate with others and ourselves. Our perceptions and our conceptions of what we believe to be true or factual is not necessarily accurate all of the time. I smiled when I finished that sentence, and my use of “time”. It has become so commonplace to use words that don’t make sense to convey our messages. 

The practice of trying is important. I will try not to limit myself. The only truth is the now. I cannot relive past events, and I cannot foretell future events. So why try doing so? I can however experience the moment. In doing so, I can experience life. I am typing. This is my current experience and it is tangible as my fingers touch the keys, as my eyes read the words, as my ears hear the movement of the keys (as well as a fan working). I can smell hot chocolate, and I can enjoy the flavor when I take a sip. Experiencing life in the moment is all that I can experience. Taking the time to do so is the key. I am not limited or constrained. I am here.

Please try and practice for yourself, too.

The Practice of Self-Compassion

The practice of compassion is beautiful.

Photo by Christopher Rusev on Unsplash

For many, our experiences continue to influence our actions, whether consciously or subconsciously. Still for many, we are haunted--as we replay in our minds (ruminations) these memories trying to reconfigure, or reshape, or “correct” undesirable events. Initially, this process is instrumental to develop an understanding of the event(s) itself as well as to hypothesize our options. But then, we must stop. This is part of our crux. We continue to replay, over and over the past, hoping for a different outcome, creating stress, detachment, and pain. 

The practice of compassion is beautiful. When we are able to experience empathy for our fellow human-being, we step out-of-ourselves and into an entirely different experience. The same practice is possible, and necessary, for each person on an individual level--to heal. 

Below is a posting in Just Love Audio, from Mark Nepo

“Compassion

I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These are your greatest treasures. Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world. - Lao Tzu

At first, we might ask, "How can being compassionate to yourself reconcile all beings in the world?"

To understand the gift of this, we need to recall the analogy of the Spoked Wheel, in which each life is a separate and unique spoke, and yet all lives, like those spokes, meet in a common hub or center. That's why when we tend our deepest center, we care for all souls.

Another powerful way to realize our interconnectedness is to imagine the human family as a stand of aspens growing by a river. Though each tree appears to be growing independently, not attached to the others, beneath the soil, out of view, the roots of all the trees exist as one enormous root. And so, like these trees, our soul's growth, while appearing to be independent, is intimately connected to the health of those around us. For our spirits are entwined at center, out of view.

Once realizing this, it becomes clear that we have no choice but to embrace the health of our neighbors as part of our own health. I felt this deeply in the many cancer rooms I sat in. I know these things to be true: in cutting off strangers, we cut off ourselves; in choking roots, we choke our own growth; in loving strangers, we love ourselves.

Having come this far, I believe that Lao Tzu's third instruction tells us that if we are aware of our own suffering with the wish to relieve it, we will overcome distrust and reestablish a close relationship with all other living things. In deep and lasting ways, when we heal ourselves, we heal the world. For as the body is only as healthy as its individual cells, the world is only as healthy as its individual souls.

Across the centuries, we have this timeless medicine: Live directly, wait, and care for your soul as if it were the whole world.

1.     Breathe slowly, and feel your heart constrict and dilate as your eyes do.

2.     Breathe slowly, and care for your soul with each breath. Feel your heart expand. Feel your sense of self open.

3.     Breathe slowly, and feel your sense of the world open as you care for your soul.

The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo”

Rolling with Anxiety

By letting go, we allow something other than ourselves to receive.

Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

Evolutionary speaking, anxiety is natural and necessary. This neurophysical process alerts us to potential dangers in the environment and allows us to take actions to protect. We have all heard of the “fight”, “flight”, “freeze” responses. Right? However, the physical sensations often experienced during intense anxiety, such as shakiness, accelerated heart rate, muscle tightness, and even nausea, to name a few, are undesirable, and at times damn right crippling to many.

Within the context of therapy, I have noticed time and time again individuals struggle, initially, with the proposal of “rolling with the anxiety”. I can see their thoughts take form on their faces, and I am not surprised when later in therapy they tell me that they thought I was full of sh!# at that time, but express that rolling with the symptoms through early detection is the “easier and softer way” (to borrow a phrase from recovery). 

So why? Why do so many people, initially, struggle with rolling with the symptoms?

It seems logical to proceed with caution—resist a change, when there is an unknown that is presented. That is the whole reason for experiencing anxiety to begin with! There is an unknown which is perceived to some extent to be a threat, and the body is telling the brain to prepare—be on alert. So, when I propose a change, their response is completely natural considering the circumstance.

I have heard many people say, “change is hard”, or better yet, “I DON’T LIKE CHANGE!”. Because to change means that there is an unknown. This is a perfect example of anxiety working for us. We are alerting ourselves that we are uncomfortable. Great! Now, let’s use this to our advantage, rather than feeling imprisoned. 

Quite a few years ago, I was in a session with a teenager, who came to see me because he was experiencing symptoms of anxiety. I remember that he said, “I don’t like change, man”, “change is uncomfortable”. So, I took those statements in and continued with the session. During the next time we met, I was wearing a pair of jeans, a t-shirt, and a pair of chucks. I asked him if he noticed anything different, and his reply was, “yeah, you are not wearing a tie, you are wearing jeans and sneakers”. To which I asked, do I look comfortable? His reply was something to the tune of, yes. I then explained quite simply, I am. All that I needed to do was change. He smiled.  

If we can change our perceptions of anxiety from, “I don’t want any part of that” to, anxiety is a natural process—an alert system detecting feelings of being uncomfortable, we can change the very way we experience life. Now that is freeing!

Within breathing is one of the most beautiful rhythms of life—receiving and letting go.

Search within. Listen to yourself.

When we ask ourselves these questions, “how do I feel?” or, “what do I do [now]?”, do we listen and wait for the reply?

Embedded in every human is a survival frame of mind passed along generationally. However, some of our techniques are misguided or overused, misused or even forgotten. Take a moment and think about how we interact with one another—how on a global or macro scale we communicate and respond to one another, and how these modes influence interactions on an individual micro level. In the simplest of simple forms, we compete. Even deeper still, there is something fundamentally wrong with our external interactions. We are killing off our race, to save our race. Take a moment and ponder this. Really? Yes. This is ludicrous! Pause. Search your gut. What does it say?

Search within. Listen to yourself.

Listen to yourself. I have seen so many people, including myself, consumed with nonsense and nonsensical thoughts—all in a purpose to survive. In a world of disharmony, how are we adding into this dysfunction? The world is in disharmony, and has been for some time. Far before I was born, and far before humans penned our thoughts. Pause and ask yourself, why are there numerous books on the shelves in bookstores (those that are left) with messages about meditation, mindfulness, self-help, and so on? The true message sent by the sheer volume of this subject is, the world is chaotic—internal chaos, externally expressed. Otherwise, why would there be such a need? We are searching for an inner need or an experience of balance through external means. Conflictual? Perhaps.

We are searching, and hoping that our training or learned behaviors to seek help externally is the solution to the perceived problem when we ask, “what is wrong with me?”. We seek to experience comfort and understanding. We seek the truth. When we ask ourselves these questions, “how do I feel?” or, “what do I do [now]?”, do we listen and wait for the reply?

Search within. Listen to yourself.

There is an exercise that may be helpful to begin reconnecting to the inner self. This can start today! Over the next 30 days, begin each morning with an entry into a journal. This entry will begin by setting a small goal for yourself such as,

“I will appreciate the moment after an unexpected event” or,

“identify positives attributes about yourself” or,

“try not to control the situation” or,

“listen”.

Then, as the day turns into night, or perhaps before you close your eyes to rest, pull out the entry you made in the morning and reflect. Ask yourself questions such as,

“what was it like just after the unexpected event?” or,

“what attributes did I demonstrate today?” or,

“was I controlling?/ when did I let go?” or,

“what was it like to listen, fully, rather than seeking to be heard?”.

Then, reflect and expand on your thoughts about your developing insight into yourself and into your experiences with the world. Below is an actual excerpt from one of my practices that I randomly opened up to as I was preparing to write today (see photo above as well):

Goal: “Try & do the next right thing”

Reflections:

I noted that I began the day with projections (centered in anxiety and fear); a felt need to be "respected".

“Listening to someone’s woes without feeling the necessity to counter theirs with mine.”

My grandmother, Rita, passed away that day, 2/28/2017. As I reflect now, it is amazing how timely the goal was, and how it helped set a tone for the day. I wasn’t the only one hurting. When we truly practice getting out of ourselves (thoughts and expectations) and attune to other’s needs we become connected—to the other, and to our-true-self (which we rarely allow ourselves to see).

This practice can help in reducing anxiety, stress, worry, and frustrations to name a few, while helping us to reconnect to each other by removing the veil. It is like searching for a button in a pitch-black room. By turning on the light (self-reflecting or introspection), we begin to see the room (our environment) clearly, thus allowing ourselves the freedom to freely move around. Now that sounds like harmony and balance! Please try it, not for me, but for you.