The Practice of Self-Compassion

The practice of compassion is beautiful.

Photo by Christopher Rusev on Unsplash

For many, our experiences continue to influence our actions, whether consciously or subconsciously. Still for many, we are haunted--as we replay in our minds (ruminations) these memories trying to reconfigure, or reshape, or “correct” undesirable events. Initially, this process is instrumental to develop an understanding of the event(s) itself as well as to hypothesize our options. But then, we must stop. This is part of our crux. We continue to replay, over and over the past, hoping for a different outcome, creating stress, detachment, and pain. 

The practice of compassion is beautiful. When we are able to experience empathy for our fellow human-being, we step out-of-ourselves and into an entirely different experience. The same practice is possible, and necessary, for each person on an individual level--to heal. 

Below is a posting in Just Love Audio, from Mark Nepo

“Compassion

I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These are your greatest treasures. Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world. - Lao Tzu

At first, we might ask, "How can being compassionate to yourself reconcile all beings in the world?"

To understand the gift of this, we need to recall the analogy of the Spoked Wheel, in which each life is a separate and unique spoke, and yet all lives, like those spokes, meet in a common hub or center. That's why when we tend our deepest center, we care for all souls.

Another powerful way to realize our interconnectedness is to imagine the human family as a stand of aspens growing by a river. Though each tree appears to be growing independently, not attached to the others, beneath the soil, out of view, the roots of all the trees exist as one enormous root. And so, like these trees, our soul's growth, while appearing to be independent, is intimately connected to the health of those around us. For our spirits are entwined at center, out of view.

Once realizing this, it becomes clear that we have no choice but to embrace the health of our neighbors as part of our own health. I felt this deeply in the many cancer rooms I sat in. I know these things to be true: in cutting off strangers, we cut off ourselves; in choking roots, we choke our own growth; in loving strangers, we love ourselves.

Having come this far, I believe that Lao Tzu's third instruction tells us that if we are aware of our own suffering with the wish to relieve it, we will overcome distrust and reestablish a close relationship with all other living things. In deep and lasting ways, when we heal ourselves, we heal the world. For as the body is only as healthy as its individual cells, the world is only as healthy as its individual souls.

Across the centuries, we have this timeless medicine: Live directly, wait, and care for your soul as if it were the whole world.

1.     Breathe slowly, and feel your heart constrict and dilate as your eyes do.

2.     Breathe slowly, and care for your soul with each breath. Feel your heart expand. Feel your sense of self open.

3.     Breathe slowly, and feel your sense of the world open as you care for your soul.

The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo”